Welcome to Day 6 of Homeschooling Enrichment series! Today weβre finishing up our look at 1 Corinthians 13 in relation to homeschooling.
continued from Day 5β¦
8. Love is not easily angered
Oh this one hits home hard for me! I never realized I could fly off the handle so quickly until I had kids. I used to be calm, relaxed, easy going, but boy can those little guys push my buttons! Unfortunately, if I havenβt started my day in fervent prayer seeking God for patience, Iβll lose it in about 2 seconds. I did a search on βslow to angerβ for this section. I was looking for James 1:19 βSo then my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrathβ but what I found instead was a whole page of verses that came back stating that βthe LORD is slow to anger and abounding in loveβ Wow! Iβve been on the receiving end of His rich love so many times, why is it so hard for me to pour out that same love on my children? Letβs be careful to be slow to anger and quick to listen to our children!
One of the verses I have memorized over the years is James 1:20 βfor the wrath of man [mom] does not produce the righteousness of God.β
9. Love keeps no record of wrongs
Ughβ¦another one for me! I have to say that Iβm wonderful at remembering all the wrong things my children and husband have done over the years. I can recall in an instant that time several years ago when so-and-so did such-and-such. (Strangely though, I canβt seem to remember what we ate for lunch yesterday without looking at my meal planβ¦hmmβ¦)
But love keeps no record of wrongs! Itβs so easy to bring up some previous instance and beat our kids over the head with it when some opportunity for fun comes up. βMom, can I have a play date?β βNo! Remember yesterday when you did *whatever*!β Be careful not to hold on to bitterness over their failures and disobedience.
Hebrews 12:14-15 βPursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord: looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled.β
Yikes, I do not want to be the one responsible for defiling anyone!
My beloved sisters (and brothers) do not let the root of bitterness rob you and your children from loving one another! Un-forgiveness is like a poison the offended party eats in hopes of causing pain to another but in reality it will eat us up! How many time should we forgive each other? Matthew 18:22 tells us seventy seven times!
How many times has your heavenly Father forgiven you?
10. Love does not delight in evil
How many times have I told my children βI told you so!β ?
We can even seem happy that our children have received a natural consequence for their actions. Proverbs 24:17 says βDo not gloat when your enemy falls; when they stumble, do not let your heart rejoice.β If we are to treat our enemy with this kind of respect, how can we rejoice when our children who we love fail?
Confession timeβ¦this is Confessions of a homeschoolerβ¦.So, my husband and I have agreed to let our children go to things before that we didnβt feel like going to. We allowed it because we knew that our kids would disobey between now and then so we could take it away as a consequence! I think in legal terms thatβs called βentrapmentβ. And then when the inevitable happens, we smile at one another rejoicing that we didnβt have to endure yet another birthday party at Chucked-Up-Cheese!
Delighting in our childrenβs failures is not supporting them, encouraging them, or lifting them up! From now on, I’ll do my best to set them up for success by guiding them, reminding them, and teaching them to be responsible. We canβt expect that they always know the best choices to make even thought it may seem obvious to us as adults. Remember theyβre kids, they are self serving, self seeking bundles of joy that need constant re-direction to stay on task!
11. Love rejoices in truth
- How often do I point out my childβs faults?
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How often do I point out their success?
On an average day, how many positive and negative comments do we make in regards to our children? Most of us can easily answer that the majority of our comments are negative. βDo this, donβt do that, what were you thinking?β
Remember to pray for wisdom regarding your children. Ask God to give you His love for your kids. To show you what their strengths are, so you can focus on those, and how you can use things like strong willed behavior for good!
Let your children know that God has given them all gifts, seek out what those gifts are and praise and encourage them in that!
12. Love always protects
Am I faithful to support my children and have their backs in all things?
Galatians 6:2 says βCarry each otherβs burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.β Letβs be sure to help our children in whatever area they are lacking. Help them to be responsible, remind them to do the things that are required of them, show them how to be faithful. It is our job to train and disciple our children, they donβt come out of the box knowing how to act and what to do. Bummer I know, our jobs would be so much easier if they did!
13. Love always trusts
Do I trust my children or hold past deceptions against them?
Have a willingness to always pursue a trusting relationship with our children. Lying can drive a spike into any relationship, and knowing that our children have deceived us can be very hurtful. Thatβs why itβs important to be consistent in discipline. If you missed it head back to Day 3 where we talked about discipline. If you have an agreed upon plan for discipline in your household you will be more successful in avoiding lying and deception between you and your children.
In our house we have a double consequence for lying. Remember when dealing with this that we have all lied, weβve probably even lied to our children at some point. Be firm on this rule, but remember that love does not keep hold of bitterness!
Rom 5:5 Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.
14. Love always endures all things
Do our children know that we love them? Do they have a false expectation that our love is conditional depending on their behavior? I remember talking to my 4 year old one night because she said that I didnβt love her anymore. I said βdonβt you know that Mom and Dad love you no matter what you do?β She sadly replied βnoβ. That broke my heart! From that point on, whenever she disobeys I am careful to let her know that I still love her no matter what bad choices sheβs making. I also made sure that she knew that Jesus loves her no matter what as well. Our love for our children should be un-conditional. Our children can easily take our anger towards them as a sign of our lack of love for them.
Take some time today and make sure that your kids know that you love them no matter what they do, that you will never leave nor forsake them, just as our heavenly Father will never leave nor forsake us!
15. Love always perseveres
Go all in!
Col 3:21 Fathers [mothers], do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged. As ministers of our family (Day 2) it is our God given calling to train up our children in the way they should go (Prov 22:6). We can impart the same grace we have been given to our children, showing them that we are in this for the long haul.
We can stick with them through their trials and give them the security knowing that they arenβt going through life on their own. If something isnβt working in our homeschool we have the power and authority to change it. If somethingβs causing us or our children frustration, throw it out! (Well, sell it on ebay) But find something that does work!
I spent the first couple years of our homeschooling with the attitude that we were βtrying it outβ. I knew that if I failed we could just stick the kids in school and be done with it. I wasnβt fully committed to our decision to homeschool or to my kids education. Once I decided to go all in, our school came alive, and I think God was up there breathing a sigh of relief that Iβve finally accepted His calling!
16. Love never fails
God gives us everything we need to disciple and train our children. God gave us our children knowing how foolish we are, but He also gave us the answers that will give us the ability to succeed in this journey! He wants us to pray for our needs, letting us know that whatever we pray for in His name he will give us! We may (and probably will) fail, but He never fails, and His love and guidance will carry us through on this journey.
Todayβs Challenge:
Spend some extra time in prayer today again asking God to help you in any area you are lacking when it comes to following 1 Corinthians 13 in your home and homeschooling.
All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.β 2 Timothy 3:16-17
Stick around tomorrow for Day 7 of Homeschooling Enrichment where weβll talk about getting your kids in the Word.
Note: Some of the ideas from today came from an awesome bible study on parenting that my husband and I have just started which Iβd highly recommend going through, plus itβs FREE online at βParenting as a Ministryβ.
Be sure to visit these brilliant women in this 10 days adventure between February 7th-18th! We love these ladies and we know you do too.
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Great post! Convicting, but not condemning… Thank you!Semalee @ Nailing Jello to a Tree
I love your parenting twist on this passage about unconditional love! Thank you for your encouragement and edification!
Thank you for loving us (sisters in Christ but perfect strangers)…Thank you for loving us enough to take time out of your day to lift us up and show us that in Christ we are loved. Thank you for this time of reflection.Happy Valentines Day to you and your family.Blessings~
Awesome post. Reminders we all need at times. Checking out the "Parenting as Ministry" link…
Thanks for sharing more on Love…parenting from God's perspective is a treasure our kids need as a legacy.
Just what I needed today.
Ouch with the delighting in evil part! I never thought being glad of a natural consequence happening was delighting in evil. That really hit home. Thank you for your honesty and truth!~Jessica
Erica–I have to ask you—are you spying on me in my house? It sounds like you live in my house. (Hahahahaha) This is such an amazing post. Keep encouraging others.
This Enrichment series has been so helpful to me. Will you put them all in a downloadable file format when you are done with all 10? I would love to be able to periodically re-read them & remind myself of where I need to be!!! Either way, THANK YOU so much for this & all of the things you post about!!!!
Kimberly: Yes, I was already thinking about doing that, so since you asked ;o) I'll get one together with all the posts!